Digital Brainwaves

I hope this letter is real, and doesn’t turn out to be a hoax email forward, cause it’s too hilarious. Not to mention dead-on.

June 27, 2008

Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton

United States Senate

476 Russell Senate Office Building

Washington, D.C. 20510

Dear Mrs. Clinton,

I recently read where you have incurred substantial debt with your unsuccessful campaign for the Democratic Presidential nomination. Your plight concerns me and I would like to help as much as I can. I would certainly hate for you to feel pressured, due to the size of your debt, to support a candidate that you do not truly believe is ready to be “Commander in Chief on Day One.”

I have always believed that our form of government, while less than perfect, is the best the world has to offer. I’ve also always believed that Congress with 535 elected members has more power to do good for this country than only one person or even nine people. Congress has the power and ability to guide and direct this country like no other group.

I vividly remember in 2006 how the Democrats gained control of both houses of Congress trumpeting “Change” and a better America. Let’s review how that has worked out for us.

* Mortgage companies have declared bankruptcy costing thousands of people their jobs
* Home values have nose-dived
* Millions of Americans have lost their homes
* World oil prices have risen astronomically
* The Democrats continue to block drilling in oil rich reserves to continue and even increase our dependence on foreign oil
* Gasoline prices have increased to over $4 a gallon and there appears to be no end in sight even though Americans have reduced their driving over one billion miles a month.
* The stock market, where most Americans’ retirement hopes are invested, has dropped by more than 15%.
* Food prices are increasing at an alarming rate fueled mostly by rising energy costs

All in all I’d have to say that the Democrats fulfilled their promise and have brought change to our country. It isn’t good change, but it is change. Unfortunately, because of all this change, change is all I have to give you to help you retire your debt.

I am enclosing one penny for you to add to your campaign “war chest.” I think that’s a fair trade. Everything you’ve done for me is worth about a penny and because of the success of the Democrats, that’s all I have. Just so you know that you really aren’t alone in this, I had to borrow the penny from a friend.

I do have one simple request in return. I would really appreciate it if you could teach me how I can get the American people to pay off my debts that I knowingly and willingly incurred. Isn’t this a great country?

Good luck in your future endeavors.

Sincerely,
Steve Russell

American citizen, patriot, veteran, taxpayer and voter

That was fast:

“At Virgin Mobile, you’re more than just a number. When you call us we’ll treat you like a person, not a client. Whether you’re #9 or #900, you’ll get hooked up with somebody who’ll finally treat you just how you want to be treated.”

It’s that time again…

This post is late this year, but March 15th is still International EATAPETA Day.

That’s right, it’s the day when we piss off the hypocrites at PETA who have the highest kill-rate out of any animal shelter in Virginia; who send their people to lie to vets and shelters and steal animals that they then euthanize, and who create hugely offensive ad campaigns that compare the slaughter of food animals to the slaughter of Jews in the Holocaust.

Yep. It’s EATAPETA Day.

On March 15th, we make sure we eat meat, fish, or dairy products—all the stuff that pisses of the PETA vegans—in protest of PETA’s deceptive and execrable tactics.

I think my brother owes me lunch for his use of my washer and dryer tomorrow…  Hmmmmmmmm…..

That Governor Spitzer may have been caught up in a prostitution sting…

…or this rather silly-looking picture from his abrupt press conference this afternoon?

(AP photo, retrieved from FOXNews.com)

Biggest news of the day, hell of the year so far, was– no, not the iPod shuffle price drop. Fidel Castro announced his intention not to seek reelection by Cuba’s parliament this weekend. His younger (albiet only by five years) brother Raul will likely take over, though who knows how much longer he’ll be around either?

Raul says he wants to implement reforms, but I’m skeptical until I see it, or until someone who isn’t a Castro or any other member of his party takes control through democratic election. Scott Ott, though, thinks he has the perfect successors:

Rumors in Cuba carry the currency of mainstream media coverage in the U.S., and many Castro-supporters are eager to find new leadership that combines Castro-like charisma with iron-fisted leadership tactics and revolutionary support for government-run health care, education and industry.

“A Clinton-Obama ticket,” said one unnamed Cuba scholar, “combines the power and the glory that was Fidel Castro, with the unshakable commitment to collectivism, controlled economies, and virulent resistance to the United States as a superpower.”

Last night I was watching parts of Sunday Night Football (for the periods while I wasn’t watching The Amazing Race 12), and NBC started their whole NBC Green is Universal deal by shutting off the studio flood lights and going dark for the remainder of the pre-game, half-time and post-game shows.

Anyone else think they’d save even more energy if they’d shut off all those plasma screens (or LCDs, or whatever they are) behind them, and in front of the desk?

They had flashlights, you’d totally still be able to see the commentators. No ubiquitous logo branding, though. Obviously, they couldn’t go that way.

Don’t get me wrong — I’m no fan of John Edwards. But his campaign put together an awesome video illustrating just how weaselly a politician Hillary Clinton is. It takes skill (and not in a good way) to give two (or more) different answers in the space of the same debate, sometimes in the same response.

I just lost!

And so did you.

’nuff said: Ahmadinejad to Visit Ground Zero, Or Vice Versa.

(2007-09-19) — President George Bush today said he would consider “alternative means” to accommodate a request by Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to visit ‘Ground Zero‘, the former site of the World Trade Center towers, during his trip to the United Nations next week.

“You know the old expression,” Mr. Bush said. “If Mahmoud can’t come to Ground Zero, we may have to bring Ground Zero to Mahmoud.”

The White House refused to clarify the president’s statement.

*DING* WINNER.

Sad news from the wildfire-fighting front:

YREKA, Calif. — A helicopter delivering water to firefighters battling a blaze in the Klamath National Forest crashed Monday, killing the pilot, authorities said.

Investigators were trying to determine what caused the chopper to go down in “extremely rugged” mountain territory about 12 miles southeast of Happy Camp in Siskiyou County, said Duane Lyon, a U.S. Forest Service spokesman.

Call your representatives and senators now, and demand nothing less than a full withdrawal from California.

*waits patiently for the start of a “bushes fried, people died” chant*