Via 10NBC in Rochester and MSNBC: Fort Lupton, Colorado judge Paul Sacco seems to have found a good way to cut down on repeat offenders to the city’s noise ordinance: force those determined guilty to listen to Barry Manilow, Barney, and other music less desirable to backyard rockers.
Ten years ago, Judge Sacco noticed something that bothered him. It wasn’t just the fact that so many of the faces in his courtroom were so very familiar to him. There were a lot of repeat offenders.
Now, what really irked him was the idea that many of them were teenagers who simply came equipped with their parent’s cash in hand to help them pay off the fines that he would inevitably impose.
“So they weren’t getting a lot out of it,” he said. That’s when he decided to do something a tad unorthodox. Call it Fort Lupton’s version of the Golden Rule. Judge Sacco says it has really cut down on “repeats.”
What’s the weirdest judicial sentence you’ve ever heard of?
Via Jayski, ESPN reports on David Letterman’s Top Ten list becoming a Top Twelve for a night, with NASCAR’s Sprint Cup Series Chase for the Championship drivers telling of the
top 12 perks of being a NASCAR driver:
- No. 12 — Matt Kenseth: “Crazy gas prices? I don’t care; I’m not payin’.”
- No. 11 — Kevin Harvick: “Bring your helmet to Taco Bell and they’ll fill it up with guacamole, free.”
- No. 10 — Jeff Gordon: “Don’t have to shave your body like Olympic swimmers â€¦ although, why not?”
- No. 9 — Greg Biffle: “Hasselhoff promised me one of those talking cars.”
- No. 8 — Tony Stewart: “I use old checkered flags to make fabulous throw pillows.”
- No. 7 — Jeff Burton: “There’s nothing like going through a car wash at 190 miles per hour.”
- No. 6 — Denny Hamlin: “GPS underpants.”
- No. 5 — Clint Bowyer: “Sorry, I forgot my joke — I was thinking about Jessica Alba — man, she’s hot.”
- No. 4 — Dale Earnhardt Jr.: “Run out of olive oil? A little Quaker State will spruce up any salad.”
- No. 3 — Jimmie Johnson: “Traveling to exotic locations like Martinsville, Virginia, and Dover, Delaware.”
- No. 2 — Carl Edwards: “At high school reunions, it’s fun to ask, ‘So what do you do for a living?’ “
- And the No. 1 perk of being a NASCAR driver — Kyle Busch: “After a race, your ass vibrates for days.”
I hope this letter is real, and doesn’t turn out to be a hoax email forward, cause it’s too hilarious. Not to mention dead-on.
June 27, 2008
Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton
United States Senate
476 Russell Senate Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20510
Dear Mrs. Clinton,
I recently read where you have incurred substantial debt with your unsuccessful campaign for the Democratic Presidential nomination. Your plight concerns me and I would like to help as much as I can. I would certainly hate for you to feel pressured, due to the size of your debt, to support a candidate that you do not truly believe is ready to be “Commander in Chief on Day One.”
I have always believed that our form of government, while less than perfect, is the best the world has to offer. Iâ€™ve also always believed that Congress with 535 elected members has more power to do good for this country than only one person or even nine people. Congress has the power and ability to guide and direct this country like no other group.
I vividly remember in 2006 how the Democrats gained control of both houses of Congress trumpeting â€œChangeâ€ and a better America. Letâ€™s review how that has worked out for us.
* Mortgage companies have declared bankruptcy costing thousands of people their jobs
* Home values have nose-dived
* Millions of Americans have lost their homes
* World oil prices have risen astronomically
* The Democrats continue to block drilling in oil rich reserves to continue and even increase our dependence on foreign oil
* Gasoline prices have increased to over $4 a gallon and there appears to be no end in sight even though Americans have reduced their driving over one billion miles a month.
* The stock market, where most Americansâ€™ retirement hopes are invested, has dropped by more than 15%.
* Food prices are increasing at an alarming rate fueled mostly by rising energy costs
All in all Iâ€™d have to say that the Democrats fulfilled their promise and have brought change to our country. It isnâ€™t good change, but it is change. Unfortunately, because of all this change, change is all I have to give you to help you retire your debt.
I am enclosing one penny for you to add to your campaign â€œwar chest.â€ I think thatâ€™s a fair trade. Everything youâ€™ve done for me is worth about a penny and because of the success of the Democrats, thatâ€™s all I have. Just so you know that you really arenâ€™t alone in this, I had to borrow the penny from a friend.
I do have one simple request in return. I would really appreciate it if you could teach me how I can get the American people to pay off my debts that I knowingly and willingly incurred. Isnâ€™t this a great country?
Good luck in your future endeavors.
American citizen, patriot, veteran, taxpayer and voter
“At Virgin Mobile, you’re more than just a number. When you call us we’ll treat you like a person, not a client. Whether you’re #9 or #900, you’ll get hooked up with somebody who’ll finally treat you just how you want to be treated.”